Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus. Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is commendable, if there is any excellence, if there is anything worthy of praise, think about these things. What you have learned andreceived and heard and seen in me—practice these things, and the God of peace will be with you. (Phil. 4:6-9, ESV)
There’s a meme that often floats around Facebook that goes something like “post one word about your day, then copy and paste and I’ll do the same for you.” I don’t usually participate in memes, but if I did, I could certainly give one word about this day, minus the whole cut-and-paste thing.
Exhilarating.
Emotional.
Humbling.
Exhausting.
Exciting.
Eye-opening.
Beautiful.
All of that in a span of 24 hours. I assure you, it’s s a day worth reading about.
Our friendly Alpha Rooster again started his wake-up calls at 3:30 AM. I chose to ignore his persistence and sleep in until 6:45. The team was up, preparing for their big excursion into Bweyale. Breakfast was a simple affair as a result: bread with butter and sugar, and tea. After breakfast, Rachel brought the team devotions: a simple reminder to bring our requests to God, no matter how great or how small the need. We then spent some time in prayer for each other. I prayed specifically for Kristie, knowing she’s got a lot on her heart and mind, and hoping that this trip will be a positive experience for her.
It was then time to load up into the truck for the excursion into town! I felt, for many reasons, a conviction to stay behind. Though I couldn’t articulate all the emotions I was feeling, something about that outing just didn’t sit right with me. With the team’s blessing, I opted to remain at the village. It ended up working out pretty well, seeing as how the truck barely fit the 9 that went.
Little did I know the lessons I would learn, the divine appointments, the overwhelming sense of God’s presence I would have in the short time the team was gone.
Because I had the time and opportunity, I took a few moments to myself: freshened up a bit, wrote in my journal, spent some time in the beautiful quiet with just me and my thoughts. Praying. Processing. As I was there, Janelle came by and we talked for a few minutes. She said something funny, so I laughed. And as I did, one of the myriad of pesky, persistent, pervasive flies FLEW IN MY MOUTH and lodged itself in the back of my throat.
“I just swallowed a fly!” I managed to croak, as I tried to determine if the darn insect was far enough forward to spit out.
“You swallowed a fly?!?” she asked, a bit surprised to say the least.
Nope. Too far back to spit out. GULP. “Yep. Just did.”
Maybe I should have gone for the termites on Sunday morning after all. At least they had a peanutty aftertaste.
Later, over lunch, as we were sharing the story, Janelle commented, “Wasn’t there a song about that? Something about someone who swallowed a fly.”
Oh yeah. There was an OLD LADY who swallowed a fly…I don’t know why she swallowed the fly…PERHAPS SHE’LL DIE. Words of comfort, for sure. Thanks. Thanks a lot.
After such a tasty snack, I was ready to get up and do something…away from flies. According to our handy-dandy “excel spreadsheet” posted in our hut, it was nearly time for the P4 class to head to the library. I wanted to see the new library, and thought there might be a possibility of helping the teacher during that time, so I headed up to the building…only to discover the library was locked…and no one was inside. Knowing the bead room was just a few doors down, I decided to wait there, to see if the P4 class was just running a few minutes late.
What I ended up doing was dancing like an elephant.
Let me tell you a story about Americans,” an African Christian friend said to me.
Elephant and Mouse were best friends. One day Elephant said, “Mouse, let’s have a party!” Animals gathered from far and near. They ate. They drank. They sang. And they danced. And nobody celebrated more and danced harder than Elephant.
After the party was over, Elephant exclaimed, “Mouse, did you ever go to a better party? What a blast!”
But Mouse did not answer.
“Mouse, where are you?” Elephant called. He looked around for his friend, and then shrank back in horror.There at Elephant’s feet lay Mouse. His little body was ground into the dirt. He had been smashed by the big feet of his exuberant friend, Elephant.
“Sometimes, that is what it is like to do mission with you Americans,” the African storyteller commented. “It is like dancing with an Elephant.” (from The Dangers of Short-Term Missions by Miriam Adeney)
Lillian was there, sitting alone, silently working. Trinity was back at the houses, being cared for by other mothers and children. On the table was a tall stack of bowls filled with beads, the result of hours of work yesterday at the hands of Jenna and her cousins as well as the team members who had spent time in the bead room. Each bowl contained 50 beads hand selected to create a specific, colorful pattern, plus numerous tiny “spacer” beads, so that all Lillian had to do was select a bowl and begin working.
I saw the stack of bowls and got excited…and a little proud. I wanted to show her *my* bowl. I wanted Lillian to see *my* pattern that I had created yesterday. I grabbed the stack of bowls and began lifting one at a time to look through them. I looked into every single bowl only to discover my pattern wasn’t there. I mentioned it to Lillian who kindly told me that my beads were probably divided between all the bowls to add some splashes of color to the other patterns.
Disappointed, I set about the task of restacking all the bowls. I’ve learned that my skills are far inferior to theirs, further evidenced as I looked at the lopsided mess of bowls leaning precariously on the table. Lillian didn’t seem to mind, but I was embarrassed that I couldn’t make those bowls stack as straight and even as she did, no matter how hard I tried. She assured me that “it’s okay”, that it didn’t matter, that I hadn’t done anything wrong.
We sat for a few more minutes, and as I realized the P4 class would not be coming to the library after all I decided to go help Grace and Consy at Kindness House before it was time for me to teach the lesson. As I stood up, I bumped the table – with my foot or leg or hip, I don’t know – and that topsy-turvy stack of bowls went crashing to the floor. Beads scattered EVERYWHERE. Bowls bounced on the hard concrete floor, spilling their entire contents, mixing patterns beyond recognition.
Suddenly, I had become Elephant. My exuberant dancing had killed the mouse. Tears of shame and embarrassment filled my eyes as I got down on my hands and knees and helplessly tried to recapture all the beads, putting as many as I could back into the bowls, not knowing what the original patterns might have been. Lillian constantly offered gentle reassurances of “It’s okay, it’s okay” as I crawled all over, finding beads that had rolled clear to the opposite side of the room, under the few shelving units that lined the walls, and nearly out the door. Humiliated, I realized it was *my* pride, *my* exuberance, *my* self-centeredness that had created this mess. Despite my best efforts, the end result was pitiful: a few random beads in a few bowls. All that work from yesterday gone. All those hours that Kari and Kayla and Victoria and Jenna had spent, digging through piles of beads, sorting handfuls to find just the right one, the right shape and the right color…wasted. And to make things even worse, I had now made Lillian’s job harder.
“I’m so sorry. I’m so sorry,” was all I could manage to say, as I blinked back tears.
In her calm and gentle way, Lillian got down on her hands and knees, looked me straight in the eyes, and with a gracious smile on her face said, “It’s okay. It’s okay. These will just be assorted color. No pattern.” And she smiled. Not just with her mouth, but with her whole face.
What grace. What beautiful, amazing grace! This quiet and peace-filled mouse, extending such grace to a bumbling elephant like me. I hugged Lillian tightly. Thank you. Thank you, sweet Lillian, for being an example of kindness and forgiveness, when I truly don’t deserve it. Thank you for showing me what God’s grace looks like.
I left the bead room, knowing I had just had experienced God in a new way. Despite the blow to my pride, my heart was filled with the joy of God’s presence, of knowing He had met me there, of knowing that He had taken the time to inhabit that bead room for a few moments so that I could see His character more clearly.
I had just seen the heart of God through the compassionate smile of a woman named Lillian.
I reached Kindness House as Consy was mopping the sitting room. I couldn’t tell whether or not she actually *wanted* my help but she welcomed me in and set right about giving me my own “mopper” (towel) and showing me where I could start. My hamstrings remind me on a regular basis how unhappy they are with my new “hobby”, but I’m definitely noticing better flexibility. We mopped together, starting with the kitchen, the porch, and then all the way around the perimeter of the house. Consy would laugh as I tried to keep up with her, almost as if we were racing. As we finished the last part of the house, Consy surprised me by washing my feet. Despite my protests – I can do this myself – she gently splashed cool, clean water over my absolutely filthy feet. She scrubbed and rubbed that red dirt off the tops of my feet and between my toes. She provided a clean, soft towel for me to stand on when she finished, and then she grabbed my flip flops. Before I could say “no, don’t bother!” she had washed my shoes, too. Scrubbed them clean as new, then gently slid my feet in so they wouldn’t get dirtied up.
Again, I was humbled. Again, I had been served by the very ones I *came* to serve. I thought of another who also spent some time washing feet. I understood the disciples’ reaction…No, you will never wash my feet! Lord, let me do this on my own. But the King of Kings knelt down and gently splashed the cool water over His disciples’ dusty and filthy feet. He scrubbed and rubbed the dirt off their calloused and hardened soles. He dried the muddy places and refreshed the tired spots.
I had once again seen the heart of God through the tender hands of a woman named Consy.
Before I melted into tears yet again, I bid Grace and Consy good-bye and returned to our hut. My heart was full of emotion, my head was spinning with understanding, but God wasn’t finished yet. There was at least one more event on His calendar for this day.
With the team gone, the responsibility fell to me to teach both the ESL/science lesson and the Bible lesson. They weren’t expected to return until lunchtime, which would be after I had completed both lessons. Jenna, Kari, Kayla and Victoria graciously offered to come and assist, so I gladly accepted their help. No sooner had we reached the classroom and were setting up the materials than the truck arrived with the team, back from Bweyale. Even though I had assured the team that I could handle the lesson on my own, I thought a few of them might come to assist as well. I was a little surprised – and honestly a little disappointed – when no one did. But I realized that allowing myself to be angry at any of them was unfair – Ididsay I could handle it, after all – so I prayed. I prayed that God would release me from any feelings of negativity toward any of my teammates, any anger or hurt, and that nothing would stand in the way of sharing His truth with these children. God honored that prayer, more than I ever expected Him to.
Simply put, the lesson was amazing. Since the P5 class had already received the lesson on taste, Elizabeth and I agreed that I would teach them the lesson on sight. While the activities were fun and engaging – and hopefully they learned something in the process – the real highlight came in the Bible lesson.
I had been given the lesson on Our Identity in Christ – Love. I chose to read the book Adam, Adam, What do You See? which had been given to Trey when he was very young and was one of our family favorites. I planned to share just a bit about each Bible character – speaking specifically to how God demonstrated His love toward them.
Adam, Adam, what do you see? I see creation all around me…
God demonstrated amazing love toward Adam by allowing him to be the one to name all the animals, to be the first man ever created, and to live in the amazing perfection of the Garden of Eden.
Noah, Noah, what do you see? I see animals in the ark with me…
God loved Noah so much that he spared Noah’s life – and the lives of his wife, their three sons, and their wives – from the worldwide flood that wiped out all creation. God taught Noah exactly how to build the ark, kept him safe from the rain, and made sure he had enough food for himself, his family, and all the animals.
And then I got to Abraham.
Abraham, Abraham, what do you see? I see a starry sky blinking at me…
I was reminded of Rich Mullins’ song, “Sometimes by Step”, where he says, “Sometimes I think about Abraham…how one star he sawhad been lit for me.” I nearly fell apart. Each one of these precious children represents a star that Abraham saw that night. Each one of them is a fulfillment of God’s promise to make Abraham’s descendents as numerous as the stars in the sky. Those stars represent the light of their lives…lives that were ordained by God long before they were ever born. And just as God loved Abraham and gave him that promise, God loves us as the fulfillment of that promise. I wished I could have opened up my heart right then and there and showed them how desperately I want them to understand their value to their Creator. How much God loves them and the great things He has planned for them. How each one of them has the potential to become a modern-day hero of the faith, like Moses, and David, and Sampson, and Mary, and Ruth, and Peter, and Paul. How much I want them to *know* His hope, live in the light of His love, and be secure in His care. Several times I felt tears squeeze out of the corner of my eyes as I felt God speaking through me, literally putting the words in my mouth…words of hope and encouragement and promise.
By the time I finished the book, I was shaking. My heart was racing and my hands were sweaty. I could hardly stand still, though my knees were weak and my legs felt like jello. I can only hope and pray that God spoke to someone…that His words touched one heart…made a difference in one life.
It was lunchtime by the time I finished, so I bid the class farewell, thanked Kayla, Kari, Jenna, and Victoria for their help, and headed back. Though I desperately needed some alone time, the schedule didn’t allow for it. We ate lunch quickly, washed up the few dishes we could, and headed back to the school building to teach the P3/P4 classes.
We met in the new school building with the combined classes.
Because these students are at a lower level, their English proficiency isn’t quite as strong. Teacher James acted as our interpreter, so everything took a little bit longer. We did the lesson on sight with them as well. They didn’t have notebooks with them so they drew their diagrams in more interesting places.
While we were teaching, the little ones from the bead room next door crept up to the doorway. They wanted to hear the stories and be a part of what the big kids were doing. And any chance to be with the muzungas is worth taking.
Ryan brought the Bible lesson. He used the book that I had used, but it wasn’t the same. I didn’t really expect it to be.
Nevertheless, he did a great job. He makes the Bible truths very real to these kids.
Elizabeth and I had to slip out a few minutes early to be on time for the P1/P2 lesson. Thankfully, the teachers were there and ready to interpret. The children arrived a few at a time until we had a group of about 15 students eager to learn. I had gotten so used to teaching teenagers that I had forgotten what a joy it is to teach the little ones. Their bright eyes and shy smiles are so endearing. And they love Love LOVE learning.
It’s absolutely necessary to have an interpreter for this level. These children are taught in Acholi almost exclusively. As much as I hated to make the teachers work during their afternoon time off, it was worth it. They thoroughly enjoyed our lesson and had fun with the activities we did.
After school, I spent some time with a precious little girl named Mercy.
A teammate of mine from my last trip had told me about Mercy, about her beautiful face and sweet personality and quiet but fun-loving nature. As soon as I met her for the first time, I understood what makes Mercy so special. We sat and talked for a bit, and I took a video for my friend. And then we took a picture of our crazy faces.
After awhile, Mercy told me, “I would like to leave now”, so I went up to Faith House and Love House to see the girls before supper. We laughed and I looked through piles and piles of their schoolwork.
Dusk settled in, the signal for our suppertime. We sat around the campfire as we ate our beans, posho and spaghetti. I was a bit overwhelmed with the day, so I enjoyed being more of an observer. I also realized that at this time next week we will be in London, far from this place and these precious people. We will be in a whole different world from where we are now. I can’t even begin to think about that, yet I can’t wait to be with my own family, loving on my own children, sharing life with my own husband. So many things about this trip are relatively “easy”…but that’s one part that never ceases to be difficult. Separating from my “stuff”, from my busy schedule, from my crazy life is almost a welcome change. But separating from those I love so much, those that are a part of my flesh and blood…that’s hard.
We returned to our gaming ways to finish the night – a rousing game of Bananagrams under the headlamps. We have a very small table and not much light, and lots of bugs that hover around, but despite the challenges it was a lot of fun. Janelle and Jenna joined us and impressed us with their unique strategies.
As I reflect on this day, I know this will be one I won’t easily forget. The moments and memories of this day have been etched deep within me. The lessons I’ve learned, the experiences I’ve had have given me a new perspective…and a new passion. I may have begun the day dancing like an elephant, but I ended the day dancing – joyously, gratefully, andgrace-fully – in my heart before my King.
No mice were harmed in the performing of that dance.