Little Miss Smartypants

The following is a transcript of an actual conversation that occurred between us and our now-5-year-old Miss Smartypants. We were walking into Target for a few things and Little Miss Smartypants kept wandering into the traffic aisle of the parking lot. Matt reminded her several times to come closer to the parked cars, but by golly, next thing we know she’s out walking in traffic again. Exasperated, Matt grabbed her by the hand and pulled her back closer to us and said, “Please, DON’T WALK IN THE STREET! You need to obey Daddy.

To which she smartly replied, “I did obey you. My legs didn’t.”

A little surprised, I responded, “Your legs didn’t??”

And with that bright little pixie face she looked up at us and said, quite seriously, “Yes. All the other pieces of my body obeyed you, but my legs just didn’t.” Oy.

After Target, it was time for lunch. We walked over to Souper Salad and were enjoying a wonderful family meal when all of a sudden, Little Miss Smartypants chirps, “Mom, I know what you need for your purse. You need a BOSTON ORGANIZER!”

Quite surprised, not only by this completely random outburst, but also by how specific this assertion is, I respond, “I do?”

“Yes!” comes the impassioned response. “You need a Boston Organizer! It has room for all your things!”

“Oh really? Like what?”

“Well first, it has a strap that goes over your head and neck so that no one can steal it from you.” And she gives me an all-knowing look, as if to say, I got your back, girlfriend. “And it has zippered pockets and a flap in front with extra storage!”

“And you can fit TWO water bottles inside it, and the compartments expand!” I look up to see that now her brother, Mr. I-will-not-be-outdone-by-a-five-year-old, has joined the conversation. Apparently expandable compartments are nearly as cool an invention as Transformers and Moon Sand. “And, Mom, you know what? The Boston Organizer comes in fashion colors: Red, Tan, and Black!”

“Oh, and Mom, you get a digital reminder!”  Little Miss Smartypants adds.

“Yeah, and it doesn’t use tape!”  from her excited partner-in-crime brother.

“Yeah, so you can just go to the store when you need butter, milk, eggs, and it will tell you, ‘butter, milk, eggs.’  You don’t even have to forget it.  It’s a digital reminder!”  Quite pleased with her sales pitch, Little Miss Smartypants takes another bite of her fruit.
And now, the final blow is delivered. Little Miss Smartypants looks directly at me and, in her most serious tone says, “Mom, you NEED a Boston Organizer.”

Yep. Just like I need the Betty Crocker 100-piece cake decorating set that comes with its own storage box and can be used to make any cake special.  Who knows?  Maybe if I act fast, I can also get a great set of gintzu knives.

1 comment

  1. She must have been talking to Michael Jon, he told me the same thing!! He said he wanted me to see the commercial about the cool purse I needed…too funny!!

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