Well, I totally missed it last week, so you’re getting this final installment a week late. But hey, who’s counting, right?
Last week was the last week of class for the 5 Love Languages of Children.  Our topic for the night was the love language of Acts of Service. The authors made a great point that parenting is a service-oriented vocation. We are constantly serving our children. When our children are young – infants, toddlers, and even preschoolers, we use all 5 love languages constantly, out of necessity. But as our children grow older, we continue to serve them, even if we don’t use the other languages. We cook them dinner, we make their beds, we help them with their homework, we teach them how to ride a bike, we teach them how to drive a car, we provide transportation to school and parties and other events…the list is endless. We might not use the other 4 languages, but we are absolutely compelled to serve our children. As children grow up and leave home to start families of their own, we are still called upon to serve in various capacities.
The ultimate goal for us as parents, however, is not to be tied in bondage or slavery to our children. Rather, by serving them, our hope is for them to learn how to serve others. As our children have their needs met by us, they can then in turn meet the needs of others. We must serve with an attitude of gratitude, not of resentment. We must find joy in doing things for and with our children that will build their self-confidence and yes, their independence.
The very first class I took in college once I changed my major to education was (seriously) ED101: Introduction to Teaching. No joke. But something that we discussed my very first day in class somehow made its way deep into my psyche and I’ve never been able to forget it: “The goal of education is to teach children to go away.” No, not leave-me-alone go away. Rather the you-can-do-it-on-your-own-now,-you-don’t-need-me go away. The job of a teacher is to take students from a state of dependence to a place of independence. As parents, our job is no different. Our ultimate goal is to move our children along a continuum, starting from the place of complete and utter dependence on us to a place where they are secure, strong, smart, self-sufficient individuals who can find their place and purpose in this world.
Daunting, you bet. But unlike teachers, we have more than 9-10 months out of one calendar year. We have 18 years, minimum. May we be diligent to redeem the time, for the years will fly by. God help us. No, really.